Review of Siri by LELO: Finally, A LELO Vibe With Some Siri-ous Power

USE / DESIGN /SHAPE       Siri is designed for perfect clitoral stimulation. She is not insertable, but her vibrations are strong enough for full-body massage. That, combined with her small size of 3 3/4 x 2 inches, means she could easily transition to couple's sex, fitting perfectly between partners. A bit meatier than her earlier counterparts Nea/Lily, she's slightly smaller than a computer mouse but big enough to easily hold on to.
Looking at her from the top I cannot help but be reminded of Italian mobster shoes from the Prohibition era because of the way the silicone wraps around the plastic. Aside from that, the design is pure genius. Rather then being curved like many of her peers, the bottom rounds out like its puckering up to kiss your clit. This is perfect for those who tend to use pressure with toys, as the shape means it sits on the pubic bone and flows right down to the clit without having to bend your wrist.

MATERIAL / TEXTURE       I have described silicone as petal soft before, but I didn't even know the meaning until I met Siri. She absolutely feels like a delicate, silky flower petal, not at all tacky, nor does she collect lint. The silicone is seam-free, non-porous and hypo-allergenic. The silicone is rigid because its covering the plastic body that turns to pure plastic on the back top and bottom. Rather, it looks like someone held Siri up and down, and then dipped the tip in silicone. I do wish the entire toy was silicone, but the combination of plastic and silicone really transmits the vibrations well. The seam between the silicone and plastic is not felt during use and there is no texture, the entire toy is soft and smooth. Siri is completely body-safe with no smell or taste, perfect for beginners to advanced users.

FUNCTIONS / PERFORMANCE / CONTROLS       This toy Siri-ously delivers. The vibrations resonate quite strongly and equally through the whole silicone tip, not pin-point like other vibes, and taper off over the plastic. The vibrations themselves are of the very strong, low-frequency, deep, rumbly type… and to make this vibe even better, she comes with 6 amazing pulse patterns which are as follows:
1) constant vibration
2) slow pulse
3) fast pulse
4) revving of the motor from low to high, low to high
5) revving of the motor from low to high, high to low
6) random pattern
The 4 controls for this unit are located on top of the toy in a plus pattern. Very easy to manipulate during use, the ( ) turns the toy on and up to full vibration, while the (-) turns the vibrations down and off. The top and bottom controls scroll through the vibration patterns. One issue I have had is that there is no emergency off button, and on more than one occasion I have thought she was turned off only to find it was still on low vibration.
When it comes to discreet, this toy certainly is. If she was left out in the open, I doubt she would attract much attention, and even if she did she would not likely be made as a sextoy. She is small and easily tucked away in her toy pouch, thrown in a purse or suitcase for travel, and she is very quiet. I have actually used this toy with my husband in the room and a fan on without him even realizing it. The only downside? Siri isn't waterproof.

CARE AND MAINTANCE      The combination of plastic and silicone are very easy to care for with only mild soap and warm water or wiped with down with toy cleaner, taking care not to get water in her buttons or in her charging port as she is not water-proof. In the event that you are sharing Siri with another partner, you can sanitize by wiping with a 10% bleach solution or rubbing alcohol. Allow to dry and store in her toy pouch or in her original packaging.
To maintain the life of her rechargeable battery, plug Siri into her charger when her control face glows red indicating a low battery. When the port is correctly connected the face blinks white and continues blinking until a full charge is reached (when it emits a steady glow). Avoid over-charging. Approximately 2 hours of charging provides up to 4 hours of vibrations.

PACKAGING
The Lelo Siri is one classy lady and so is the packaging she arrives in. Her outer box represents the color of toy ordered, baring only Lelo on the top, opening to the signature black cardboard Lelo box that denotes you have received a true luxury item. Inside, Siri is suspended in a plastic hanger intended for store display, and nestled underneath is her charger, a white satin toy pouch, multi-language user manual, 1 year warranty, and 10 year quality guarantee (50% off replacement after the warranty expires) . Perfect for storage or as a gift box, the packaging is simple, elegant, and most importantly… discreet.

Review of Texas FU?K 'EM Poker by California Exotics: This Game Of Poker, Encourages You To Poke Her!

PURPOSE / AUDIENCE
The Texas F?CK 'Em card game is designed for 2 players (although instructions are written to include more players), and can be played in a sexual way or as a drinking game. The game itself is very loosely based on (you guessed it...) simplified Texas Hold 'Em, but rather than going home with money at the end of the night, you get sexual favors. The nice thing is that you can play this game during the middle of the day and let the anticipation of receiving your winnings increase throughout the day, as opposed to strip poker or other games where the payout is "right now".

RULES / CONTENT
According to the playbook, the objective of the game is:
"Players, playing individually, try to get 5 cards which match up (by rank only) with the five poker dice which have been rolled on the table by a player who has successfully won the "bid" to roll them. The ultimate goal is to win chips or coins which can be redeemed for some naughty and sexy rewards."
The playbook is easy to understand with detailed instructions. Game play is essentially this; both players start out with 15 (or whatever agreed upon amount) of coins/chips to bet with, and is dealt 5 cards. Rounds are made and players are allowed to exchange up to two cards. Then bets are placed to determine how many rolls of the dice will be made by the winning bidder. The winning bidder gets to choose which dice to re-throw and how many times to re-throw according to how much the bid was worth (1 chip means the bidder can re-throw 1 die twice or two separate dice once each, and so on). The strategy is to control the dice so you will have the winning hand, and win the chips.

When the game is completed (one player has lost all their chips) the winner gets the pick of several mix and match sexy activities to be "bought" with the chips. For example, all 30 chips buys the winner "your lover delights you with intimate and prolonged oral sex" (or one of the other sexy suggestions) or you could "buy" two 15 chip suggestions such as "take a sudsy shower together" paired with "try a new sexual fantasy". There are many options to choose from under each amount in multiples of 5 from 5 to 30 chips, until the debt is paid.

DESIGN
This game is played with a standard deck of plastic-coated cards and 5 dice, all of which are quality made and will hold up to years of use. And fortunately, when the cards do eventually become worn, they can easily be replaced with another standard deck. The cards do not have erotic pictures on them and are rather plain. The face of the cards are pretty standard, just numbers with corresponding suit symbols. The back of the cards are white with a small magenta border and the words " Texas F?CK 'EM, Where Sex Is A Sure Bet". So, even though they aren't pornographic, they aren't quite discreet either. The dice are white and labeled in pink with the values 9, 10, Jack, Queen, King, Ace.

The game comes in a small cardboard box with a picture of a woman's navel and a royal flush tucked into her panties. The dice can be kept together in the small included zip bag, but you will probably want to put a band on the cards to keep them together in the box. Coins/poker chips are not included.

PERSONAL CONTENT
I have never played poker before and was surprised to find that this simplified version was easy enough for even me and my partner to pick up on. We thought the instructions were very clearly written and I loved that the game can be taken outside of the bedroom and used as a drinking game (although specific instructions to turn this into a drinking game weren't given, I'm sure they would be easy to improvise). I can even see this game being used in a swingers club where the winners would be able to "buy" sexual favors from different players than their respective partners. It is a very fun and relatively fast-paced game you will want to play again and again.

THANK YOU EDENFANTASYS.COM FOR ALLOWING ME TO REVIEW THIS GAME.

Review of Butterfly Kiss by California Exotics: Butterfly, Your Kiss Was A Miss

USE
The Butterfly Kiss would be best suited for women who are beginners to sex toys or who prefer small, unobtrusive shafts. This toy is a good addition to both lady's solo or couples play. It is intended to stimulate both the clit and g-spot simultaneously, although the particular way it is shaped may make it difficult to use exactly for its intended purpose. However, the moderate vibrations carry well ensuring you will find this toy a great clit stimulator, even if your body does not support the intended use. The fact that it is travel-friendly and water-proof mean you will surely find more than one way to float the butterfly or sting with the bee!

MATERIAL
Butterfly Kiss is comprised of somewhat porous, soft, jelly material with a plastic battery cap. This toy had only a slightly sweet yet rubbery smell, but I did not taste it. It is completely smooth with a moderate drag when running your fingers across it without lube. After lubrication is applied, it becomes completely slick. Unfortunately, frequent reapplication of lube may be required as this toy tends to suck up lube. Storage in a plastic bag or pouch is necessary as this toy collects more lint than a fuzz buster! The jelly is extremely soft and the shaft is very pliable. If you wiggle the toy from the base, the shaft will actually jiggle almost like Jello (picture that without smiling). The butterfly as the clit stimulator gives just the right amount of texture to add stimulation without feeling rough or intimidating for beginners. It should be noted however, that jelly toys carry a safety rating of only 2 out of 10, and do not tend to have a long shelf-life compared to higher quality toys like silicone.

DESIGN / SHAPE / SIZE
By sight this toy is quite obviously a sex toy, but since it is small and easily hidden, it is not likely to attract attention. It would also be easy to travel with, and although there is no button lock, the one button that is located on the bottom of the toy must be very deliberately pushed to turn on the toy. However, simply removing the batteries ensure no accidental powering will attract attention to your bags. And fortunately, if you are looking for a toy that is discreet in sound, this will likely fit the bill. On its highest setting it will probably not attract attention outside of a closed door. Be warned, however, that the sound tends to reverberate in the tub, so make sure any roommates are gone to ensure privacy. Fortunately, this is not an issue in the shower.
PERFORMANCE
The Butterfly Kiss was the result of a beautiful idea that didn't quite hit the mark. Its one button located on the bottom of the battery compartment is easy to access without risk of accidentally changing settings. It starts and stops with one push and continues to boast three deep and rumbly (not buzzy) speeds; low thrum, medium thrum, and OMG thrumming, but sadly does not have any pulsation patterns or emergency off switch. The 3 inch insertable shaft has a bulbous-head of 1 ¼ inch diameter that is intended to stimulate the g-spot, but because it is so soft and has no curve, I doubt it would work for most women. Especially because it has no texture and the shaft is very small, measuring only ¾ of an inch diameter, and does not carry vibration well, it does not add much excitement at the entrance either. Its second intended purpose is as a clit stimulator, but because the butterfly is only one inch in length, it probably won't stimulate all the way to the top of the clit, and for many women, this would make it completely useless. Its one redeeming quality is that the vibrations are quite strong and directed right up to the clit stimulator, so if you are willing to use this toy by laying the shaft against your vulva and perineum rather than putting it inside, the butterfly can kiss your clit as intended and you may finally find love. And while the butterfly wings don't flutter, the antennas do tingle against your clit adding the ability to tease or use light stimulation, even to the nipples.

CARE AND MAINTENANCE
The Butterfly Kiss is compatible with your favorite water-based or silicone-based lube and is easy to clean with simple soap and warm water. And because it is water-proof, you won't have to worry about water getting on the controls. However, because it is made of jelly it cannot be sanitized, so be sure to use a condom if you will be sharing this toy. This toy should be kept away from your other toys as it may have a reaction and melt, ruining both toys. Fortunately, it is small enough to fit in a standard pouch for safe-keeping. Unfortunately, no pouch is included, so be sure to add one to your order. To extend battery-life, remove the two AAA batteries from the battery compartment between uses. By simply removing the batteries, I have managed to use my Butterfly for more than 2 hours total without having to change the batteries. Although it is always a good idea to have a back-up set available "just in case".

EXPERIENCE
I have had my Butterfly kiss for over 6 months now, and while I do like this toy, it is far from my favorite. It has a way of migrating to the bottom of the toybox, usually only to be rediscovered if I am looking for something to play with in the water. As a dual stimulator, I find that the shaft is far too small to provide enough stimulation. And when it is inserted, the clit stimulator does not properly reach my clit. However, I have managed to circumvent these issues by not using the shaft internally. Instead, I lay the shaft against my vulva and move the butterfly to a more pleasurable position. First I let the antennas dance softly over my clit, then as I start to warm-up, I find that the butterfly is perfect to grind against. I love that the vibrations are deep and thrumming rather than buzzy, and are comparable to a very strong bullet.

Review of Voyage by JoyDIVISION: Voyage To The Great Beyond!

USE
This toy is best suited for women's solo or couples' play. Intended for insertion, the vibes are also mildly strong enough for clitoral stimulation. Unfortunately, because it does not have a flared base, it is not intended for anal play. It is the perfect simple dildo, great for beginners and advanced users. It is not water-proof, but is small enough to stick in a purse to travel with (remove the batteries first so it does not power accidentally).
can this product be used?

MATERIAL / TEXTURE
When it comes to material, you can take comfort in the fact that this is 100% medical-grade silicone, non-porous, and completely hypo-allergenic. The silicone sleeve is covering the base which is made of plastic, but if that end is in your nether regions, you have either inserted the wrong end or have inserted it too far! This toy has no taste or smell, and is rose petal soft with only a slight drag when you run your fingers across it. There are two raised seaweed designs in a slightly smoother texture, and although they are visually appealing, they are not noticeable on insertion. The silicone itself is rigid only at the base 2 inches of the shaft where the motor is located and then is firm but flexible at the top, strong enough for easy insertion but squeezable enough to form to your body. The best thing about silicone? It does not absorb lube the way other materials do and is perfect for beginners to advanced users.

DESIGN / SIZE / SHAPE
First of all, I have to get this off my chest... why don't you come in purple!? Okay, I'm better. The 5½ inch (4¾" insertable) Voyage is a straight dildo with such a gentle taper of 1" diameter at the rounded tip to 1¼" at the base is almost visibly unnoticeable. The matte texture silicone is completely seam-free with only a shiny raised seaweed design stemming from the base to break up the sleeve. The rounded tip eases insertion and the graduated diameter is noticed as you slide it in all the way to the base. This simple toy would easily be recognized as a dildo, but is small enough to tuck away from prying eyes or in a suitcase and is very quiet, even on full speed. It would not be heard through a closed door or may not even be heard within the same room if there was some white noise.

PERFORMANCE
I was surprised at how well the moderate high-frequency (slightly buzzy) vibrations carried from the base through the silicone to the tip of the toy. Although the vibrations can be felt throughout the toy, they do seem pin-point no matter where you place the Voyage over your clit and can easily be felt inside as well. The turn style controller is located at the base and the vibrations increase from mild to high-moderate. I love that the dial can be turned quickly off in an emergency, but is not easily changed during play. Unfortunately, there are no pulse patterns and I was not able to stimulate my g-spot, no matter how hard I tried.

CARE AND MAINTENANCE
The Voyage is compatible with water-based lubes (avoid silicone lube unless you are really curious as to what your toy would look like melted). It cleans easily with mild soap and water for use in the same orifice by the same person. However, if being used by multiple partners or anally the manufacturer recommends "clean'n'safe" for disinfecting, although other toy cleans or a 10% bleach solution should work well also. Avoid submerging as this toy is not water-proof. I would avoid other methods of disinfecting, such as boiling, because I do not think the sleeve removes easily or would easily be put back on without risk of tearing. Once dry, put the Voyage back in the included toy pouch (minus the two AAA batteries if you want to extend battery life) and store as desired.

On a side note, although I have included cleaning information should you choose to use this toy anally, it is not recommended as it does not have a flared base. However, we are all adults, and I'm sure someone will anyway.

PACKAGING
Definitely an upgrade from "novelty" toys, JoyDivision has packaged this traditional vibrator in a metallic silver cardboard box with black letter instructions in several languages over all the sides. Making it look that much cuter are large blue and fuchsia words like "vibes" and "love" scrolling around the box. The front is an open cut-out leaving the Voyage open to view through the clear plastic casing. The box opens at the top and the plastic insert holding your toy slides easily out revealing a silky silver toy pouch with black draw string that is so cute, a sample of JoyDivision lube called AQUAglide, an insert featuring some of their other products, a small instruction sheet, and 5 year material warranty.

Review of Zen Calming Gray Marble Massager by California Exotics

USE / DESIGN / SHAPE

If you are looking for a traveling companion or a toy that will go unnoticed if left sitting out or found by snooping roommates, look no further. No louder than a cell-phone on vibrate, the Zen stone looks exactly like its namesake, an approximately 3 1/2” x 2” polished marbled stone in shades of grey from dark charcoal to midnight fog. The little massager is perfect for couples as the smooth shape sits perfectly in the palm and is great for full body massage, nipples, clit, and even the penis or scrotum. Since the vibrations are felt throughout, the massager can be held flat to diffuse the vibrations or on its side to get a more pin-point sensation, so there are no shortages of ways to use this toy.

The Zen stone does have a seam that runs completely around separating the top from the bottom, but it is not felt due to its location, and not seen as the marbled design disguises it. I do wish the stone had a bit more weight so it felt more like a real stone when held. Somehow the lightness of it makes it feel cheap to me.

MATERIAL

The Zen stone massager is made of plastic, which is phthalate-free and body safe, and has absolutely no smell or taste. The plastic is completely smooth, like a polished stone with no drag what-so-ever, making it possible to use sans lube. With lube it slides over the body like vibrating silk making this toy perfect for all users. It does take a while for the material to warm to body temperature, so be sure to set on a heating pad first if you are sensitive to cool objects.


PERFORMANCE

Zen is controlled via a small push button found near the tip on the bottom of the toy, next to the battery compartment and is easily accessible. It does take two AAA batteries that seem to last for quite awhile. I've used my toy on several occasions now, for at least 15 minutes each time, and still haven't had to change them yet. The button if pushed once will turn the toy on, and when pushed again should change the speed, although I cannot detect a difference in the so-called second speed. I don't know if it is a defect in my model or if they will all be like this. If pushed once more past the second speed the unit will turn off. Unfortunately, there is no emergency off switch.

The vibrations are moderate in strength and are the high-frequency, buzzy variety that does not do much for me. I did compare them to my Lelo Nea and found that they are identical to my Nea on high, so this baby packs a punch if you like the high-frequency vibes or would be perfect for someone with a sensitive clit. The vibrations themselves are diffused pretty well throughout toy, I can detect a slightly more concentrated spot on the rounded elongated part of the Zen that works perfectly for more direct stimulation.

CARE AND MAINTENANCE

Fortunately, this toy will be compatible with all your favorite lubes and even lotion or massage oil without risk of ruining your toy. The best way to clean the Zen stone would be to wipe with toy cleaner or a cloth with mild soap and warm water. I do not recommend putting it under running water at all as it could easily go into the battery compartment. To sanitize simply wipe with alcohol or 10% bleach mixture. To extend battery life, remove the two AAA batteries between uses. This toy is not a lint collector and could be stored in a small pouch (not included) or even left sitting out on the nightstand as it is very discreet.

PACKAGING

Honestly, I'm not usually a fan of California Exotic's packaging, but the Zen Calm Massager arrived in a fairly discreet package with no naked women in sight. A small transparent plastic box tinted sea-foam green with exotic leaves wrapping around to the front where the plastic become clear and showcased the massager was actually refreshingly cute. At first glance it wouldn't attract attention as anything more than decorative stone, but since the words “massager” and “soothing vibrations” are right on the front of the box, anyone stopping to snoop would catch on. The only useful information relayed on the box is in very small print and states “do not submerse in water”, and the included directions are brief to say the least, as they contain only three pictures showing how to insert the batteries. Not a problem for me however, if it vibrates, I usually have no trouble figuring out what to do with it. The box could be easily wrapped as a gift or kept for storing your massager.

Review: Remote Control 10 Function Bullet by Pipedream

The perfect toy for men, women, and especially couples, this amazing bullet and remote combo is wireless and will work from up 25 feet or more. In my house, which is medium size, I am able to control him through closed doors from the farthest rooms with no problems! He is one of the quietest toys I own, and my husband is not even able to tell I am using the bullet while he in the same room. He is waterproof, discreet, and has 10 pulse patterns to choose from. What more could you ask for in a bullet?

My Pipedream's 10 Function Remote Control Bullet arrived in a simple small white cardboard package featuring a picture of the bullet and remote and simplistic black lettering. I opened the package to a clear plastic slide-out tray that housed the bullet, remote, batteries, and brief instruction guide on how to insert the batteries. The box could be wrapped for gift-giving or used for storage, but a simple toy pouch would take up less room and be more accessible.

The batteries are included. This toy requires one 12V (N battery) for the remote & six AG13 button batteries for the bullet. The N battery slipped quite easily into the remote with a sliding back, but I had a difficult time getting them in the bullet, which twists open. First, it did not indicate which way the batteries should face, and then it is hard to line-up the top and bottom perfectly so that the seam does not gap. Finally, with a little manipulation and patience, I got it.

Smell and taste-free, the bullet and remote are both made of plastic with Luv Touch coating that makes them feel satin-soft like a rose petal, much like my Lelo Siri's silicone. All pieces are phthalates-free, latex-free, and body-safe. The pieces are completely firm with no drag what-so-ever. The bullet does not require much lube, if any at all. There is a small seam that runs around the toy to put the top and bottom together, but it is not felt during use as long as the two pieces are connected tightly.

The bullet is a bit fatter than most standard bullets, coming in just under the size of a small egg. It features a 1.25” diameter and is 2” long. I like this size better than my smaller bullets because it carries the vibrations better and stimulates more than just one small part of my clit at a time. It has a thin 3.5” retrieval cord on the bottom that you can put your wrist through so the toy can't accidentally slip out of your hand during play, or could be used to retrieve the bullet should you insert it. I do not recommend inserting anally as the cord could become dislodged making the toy impossible to remove without a visit to your local emergency room.

The remote control is 2.5” long with a flat oval shape that fits perfectly to the palm of my hand. It has a small white Pipedream's emblem in the middle and sitting just above that are the remotes two buttons. The top one is the power button that will quickly turn the bullet on and off. The bottom button scrolls through the bullet's 10 modes. I really like that the remote has a red light on the top that flashes to confirm the modes have been changed so when you are using this with a partner there is no guessing if the controls have been pushed hard enough…especially when slippery fingers may be involved. Another great feature? Waterproof! Well, the bullet is anyway, so either find a mode you like or have your partner help you cycle to orgasm.

The vibrations are strongest at the top half of the bullet and dissipate toward the base. The vibrations themselves are a moderate intensity, but are the deep rumbly variety that carry well. While this little guy is not a power-house that will get off power-queens like myself, he works great as a tease or warm-up and would probably be perfect for those with sensitive clits. Especially with the variety of modes, such as:

1) 1111111111111.……….. Steady low vibration
2) 2222222222222.……….. Steady medium vibration
3) 3333333333333.……….. Steady high vibration
4) 1112223331112.……….. Steady escalating from low to high
5) 123 123 123 123.………. Low to high pulse
6) 333 333 333 333.………. High steady pulse
7) 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3.……….. Fast high pulse
8) 11 22 33 11 22 3.………. Increasing intensity steady pulse
9) 3333333 333333..……… Long high pulses
10) 2 2 2 2 2 2 2 2 2 ..…….. Fast medium pulse
　 Your bullet can be used with any lube or lotion and cleaned with mild soap and warm water. Because the remote is not water-proof, I recommend cleaning him with toy cleaner cloths. To sanitize, simply wipe with rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution. He is not a lint collector and is small and discreet enough to store anywhere, but I recommend adding a toy pouch to your order so you can keep him close-by, like in a nightstand or dresser!

Review: B.O.B by California Exotics

PACKAGING:               B.O.B. (battery operated buddy) arrived in California Exotics standard packaging. While not discreet, the clear plastic box with deep pink and purple words and design is both feminine and fun. Inside, BOB is housed in a clear plastic tray that slides out with a small instruction page in 6 languages on how to insert the batteries, troubleshooting, and general use information. The box could easily be wrapped for gift-giving or used for storing, although a toy pouch would take up less room.

USE / DESIGN / SIZE:            I'll admit, I wasn't overly excited about this product until I seen it in person and realized what a quality vibrator he is. BOB is simplistic, yet thoughtful in function and design. He is a slim-line toy, great for those who prefer smaller shafts and is perfect for vaginal or anal penetration, and could be incorporated into couple's play. A word of caution to anal users; BOB's flared-base is only 1 3/4” diameter, a noticeable difference to his 1” diameter shaft, especially with the nubs at the base. But for those who are over-enthusiastic and may be tempted to over-insert, look elsewhere.

I did notice that according to Eden's product page and the box itself, BOB is 6 1/2” long with a 1 3/4” diameter, which is misleading. BOB has a 1” diameter shaft that dilates to 1 3/4” over the balls/base, which are not intended to be inserted. Insertion-wise, he is 4 1/2” to the triangle nubs, or 5” to the base should you choose to insert the nubs. The total toy including the controller is 8”.

Personally, I'm not crazy about slim-line toys, and BOB is on the small side for me vaginally. He does make a great back-door buddy though. And while he was unable to angle to my g-spot (I need a definite hook), he works great for thrusting without being so long as to bruise the cervix. He is small enough to fit in a medium-size purse and would make a great multifunction toy for travel. But since he is quite obviously a sex toy, I recommended putting him in your suitcase to prevent anyone accidentally discovering him. Don't forget to take the batteries out to prevent accidental powering!

MATERIAL:          One first opening my BOB I noticed only the slightest hint of “new product” smell, which quickly dissipated after cleaning. I did not taste him. To the touch, BOB has velvety-soft, skin-like silicone with a plastic controller (non-porous, phthalates-free, body-safe) that slides easily across the skin without lube with only the slightest amount of drag. With only a small amount of lube he becomes super slippery making for easy penetration and is perfect for beginners. Fortunately, he does warm quickly to body temperature. With a moderate squeeze, he has some give, but he is not at all floppy. Since the motor is in the bottom half of the shaft and base, it is completely immobile there. However, the top half does have a moderate amount of flex that makes BOB feel more gentle than his rigid counterparts, but not flexible enough to angle for g-spotting.

Mocking a real penis, BOB has two raised wrinkles under his head and slightly raised veins all along the shaft that add visual appeal, but only a slight amount of extra sensation internally. Along the top and bottom is a seam that runs the entire length of the shaft and balls. The seam is blended very well and almost undetectable on the head, but is slightly more noticeable on the shaft, where is tends to look like another vein. I did not feel it at all internally. One other feature that creates texture is the triangle of large flexible nubs at the base of the shaft. They create an interesting, more noticeable sensation at the entrance, although some may prefer not to insert them if that much texture is not desired. I think the best way to use the nubs would be on the clit as a warm-up to penetration.


PERFORMANCE:            This 10 function vibrator is powered with 2 AA batteries which slip easily into the battery chamber and the lid turns to lock so that the controls are always facing up. The vibrations themselves are concentrated in the tip and gradually dissipate down the shaft and are barely felt at the base. The vibrations high-frequency, with a buzzy-quality that are slightly deeper than simple surface buzzy (he's a bit stronger than my Lelo Nea on high). The controller is super easy to use and reach during play. Featuring two buttons, a power button for turning the toy on and off quickly (yay, emergency off!) and another button that cycles through the vibration patterns, which are as follows:
#1) constant steady high vibes 333333333333333333
#2) constant steady moderate vibes 222222222222222222
#3) constant steady low vibes 111111111111111111
#4) throbby escalating to high (my fav) 1.1.2.2.3.3.1.1.2.2.3.3
#5) low to moderate pulse without pause 121212121212121212
#6) moderate to high pulse without pause 232323232323232323
#7) high pulse with pause 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3
#8) fast low to high pulse 131313131313131313
#9) extended high pulse with pause 333 333 333 333 333
#10) throbby escalating to moderate 1.2.1.2.1.2.1.2.1.2.1.2

I love that this vibrator remembers the last setting it was used on and will return to it when powered back on so I don't have to scroll trying to find it again. BOB is fairly quiet. On his loudest setting in a completely silent house I just barely make out his sound through a closed door, and the sound does tend to be muted a bit when he is inserted. But he is not the quietest toy I own either. He is waterproof and I have had no problems when using him in the shower, but in the tub the sound of the vibrations become very loud, so I don't tend to use him this way.

CARE AND MAINTENANCE:             As with all silicone toys, use only with water-based lube and clean with mild-soap and warm water. A 10% bleach solution or rubbing alcohol can be used to sanitize between partners or orifices (or just use a condom). Avoid boiling water or dishwashers as it would ruin the internal motor. Surprisingly, BOB does not collect much lint for a silicone toy and can be stored in his original packaging, or preferably a toy pouch (be sure to add one to your order as one is not included) with your other silicone toys. Avoid storing with cyberskin or jelly toys as they may create a melting reaction. To extend battery-life, remove batteries between uses. I have noticed that BOB is not a battery-guzzler, even with extended use the battery-life tends to hold-up pretty well.

Ultra-Soft Fingertip Attachment For Eroscillator

The ultra-soft fingertip attachment for the Eroscillator is perfect for those sensitive sallys whose clits do not like texture or pressure. Welded into a water-tight unit, she is made of silicon elastomer and is not only a different material than the standard attachments, but she feels very different too. The 1" diameter, 1" deep white marshmallow is squishy-soft like... a marshmallow.. and much more gentle than her counterparts. While it transmits the oscillations well, it does dull them a bit decreasing the intensity. As someone who prefers to use pressure with toys, I had a difficult time arousing the right amount of power as I neared climax, and the more I would push it against me, the more it would dull the sensation. However, I do find that this attachment works great after my first orgasm or during those times of the month when I am a bit more sensitive. For this reason as well, this is the attachment I would recommend using with a partner as it is texture-free and less likely to be too intense or painful as they stimulate your sensitive bits. When used with water-based or oil lubes (avoid silicone lube as it could result in a chemical melting reaction) it feels very close to an actual soft finger rubbing across the clit, nipples, or other sensitive parts.

It does clean easily with mild soap and water, but extra care needs to be taken to ensure all the lube is removed from the seam between the marshmallow and the bronze backing. This attachment does collect a small amount of lint and I recommend storing in either a plastic bag or toy pouch.

Bottom-line? I read so many glowing reviews of this attachment that I didn't dare purchase my Eroscillator without it, and although I do like this attachment, I could live without it. Especially for an additional $32.

 

*For corresponding review of Eroscillator Top Deluxe click here*

 

 

Eroscillator Top Deluxe by Advanced Response Corp.

**Review of Top Deluxe package which includes a power boost motor & additional attachments**

USE: Close your eyes and imagine a vibrator that is so gentle, yet powerful, it will give some of the most-powerful orgasms you have ever had… only its not a vibrator. Its an oscillator. And you'll truly want to close your eyes because its butt-ugly. It could be compared to a date brought home after a night of bar-hopping and hard-drinking… under the covers its a 10, but in the light of day its only a 2! Best use is newbie to pro clitoral stimulation, though she does feel nice against the nipples and perineum too. Dr. Ruth touted that the Eroscillator could coax an orgasm from almost every woman, even those who've never orgasmed before. I think she might be right.

MATERIAL / TEXTURE: The Eroscillator has no taste or smell. The attachments are semi-firm with some give and feel smooth with a slight drag, similar to silicone with various designs intended to add texture. The base is smooth plastic with ridges that make gripping easy. I do wish that the control had a different texture so it was more easily differentiated from the base. The attachments are silicon-coated TPR, excepting the soft-finger attachment which is silicon-elastomer. All pieces are body-safe.

FUNCTIONS / PERFORMANCE: If this toy was an actress, it would be Meryl Streep because although its not that stunning to look at, it delivers one hell of a performance every time. Every time. On first assessment the oscillations feel nearly like regular deeply thrumming, low-frequency vibrations. The difference is that unlike vibrators that randomly pound toward the path of least resistance, the oscillations are a side to side swinging motion, much like placing your finger on your clit and moving it back and forth- at a speed of 7200 oscillations per minute. Intensity is comparable to a strong bullet with 3 speeds that increase from a mild thrum to strong throb. The oscillations feel deeper than traditional vibes, but the real joy is the end result. Whether you are aware of it or not, traditional vibrators will temporarily numb the clitoris resulting in a dulled orgasm. The Eroscillator does not cause numbing and the orgasms are so powerful its almost unbearable. And this comes from a confirmed power-queen.
The control is straight forward; there is one sliding switch that runs the length of the base, sliding upwards to change speeds. Unfortunately, the switch can be accidentally moved during use. I find it works best to place my thumb on the recessed area that the switch would move to when the speed is changed.
When I first received my Eroscillator it was whisper-quiet and could be used while I was in bed with my husband with the fan on and he was completely unaware. However, as I've had this toy for several months I have found that its a bit louder. Still not be detectable through a closed door, but would definitely be heard by someone in the same room. I believe this is due to a loosening of the attachment joint rather than the motor itself. And although this issue is worse with some attachments more than others, it does seem to be consistently louder when I received it.

ATTACHMENTS: Ultra-soft Fingertip- perfect for sensitive clits, its also referred to as the “marshmallow”. Not only does it look like a marshmallow, it mimics a marshmallow's squishy softness.
The Golden Spoon- does look like a spoon, although I find that it is a bit too small and shallow to cradle my clit. The back of the spoon is flat to diffuse the 8 small nobs that protrude for texture.
French Legionnaire's Mustache- bulbous with nylon “whiskers” coming out either side, its easy to see why this is called a mustache. I was pleasantly surprised that the rounded smoothness of the “nose” gently seduced my clit, while the ‘stache massaged my labia with feather soft strokes.
Seven Pearl's- only attachment intended for insertion, this piece can be inserted into either the vagina or rear. Be warned however, it does not have a flared base and I hate to think of what would happen if it were to dislodge from the unit. I did try inserting this but I found that it was awkward to hold the base and far too small in length and diameter to provide much internal stimulation. The graduated balls do feel nice sliding over the clit and I use it quite often that way.
Grapes & Cockscomb- probably my favorite attachment. It is not only the most unique, but also has the most texture. The grape side is… well… like a cluster of grapes. The grapes are larger nubs than any of the other attachments and clustered together to create a strong sensation. The cockscomb is like a comb coming down with light ribbed texture that can be placed on either side of the clit to create a flicking sensation.
Ball & Cup- the Cup is hallowed out deeper than the Golden Spoon, but is a bit shorter. It does not cradle my entire clit, but will cradle the hood for a very strong sensation. It does fit perfectly over nipples and is the one suggested for use on the penis, just below the frenulum. The Ball has three large, widely-spaced nubs that dance over the clit, but can be a bit more direct than the back of the Golden Spoon.
G-Point- available for purchase separately. I do not own this attachment.
*Seperate review with additional comments concerning the ultra-soft fingertip is available here.*

CARE AND MAINTANCE: The Eroscillator is compatible with water-based and oil lubes. I have successfully used Millennium-ID silicone lube, however the use of silicone lube would not be recommended as it could react with chemicals and cause a melting reaction. If you would like to try a silicone lube, test it on a inconspicuous spot first. Remove the cord from the base for cleaning and wipe the base down with toy-cleaner or run under warm water taking care not to get water in the plug. The attachments can be washed, boiled, or even dipped in a 10% bleach solution to sanitize. The Eroscillator base does not collect lint at all, and the attachments only a minimal amount. Therefore, only a small toy bag to hold the attachments is necessary.

Please note that the included plug will correspond to the country the Eroscillator is purchased from. So be sure that if you are purchasing this toy from overseas that the plug will be compatible with your outlet.  
　
　
　
　
　
　

Softee Ballsy Super by Pipedreams: Size-Queens With Avatar Fetishes Rejoice!

PACKAGING: When the large brown package arrived in the mail, I really wasn’t sure what would await me. I tore open the box without expectations. Inside, wrapped in a clear, non-descript, shrink-wrapped plastic mold, was the largest Avatar blue dildo I have ever anticipated putting inside of me. I do believe I sat and just looked at this stallion for about 5 minutes before working up the nerve to get the scissors out and actually open the package. Of course, once I did, the first think I noticed was that my Super Softee Ballsy seemed to have brought me flowers… or ripe fruit. At least it smelled like he did. Honestly, I can’t complain that the odor was unpleasant, it was just a very strong combination of fruity-flowery smell that transferred to my hands. It continues to emit this smell even after being washed many times and left out to dissipate. Not overly sensitive to odors, this isn’t really a problem for me. For those who are, this may be a deal-breaker.

USE / DESIGN / SHAPE : No one is going to accuse Ballsy of being discreet. While he may initially appear to be a smurf dildo, it is obviously too large to belong to such creatures that live in small mushrooms. He is clearly a semi-realistic Avatar dong. And at 9 ½ “ long (8” insertable), with a just over 2” diameter, he is not going to be laying around unnoticed either. In fact, due to his size and soft material, I can’t really recommend him as a travel buddy either. However, I do believe he would be a great bedroom accessory for ladies who like to feel filled, and those who are very, very anally adventurous. While I think that those who prefer slim-lines should probably beware, I do think Ballsy would be a good starter for those who are interested in trying a larger dildo because he has a lot of give.

MATERIAL / TEXTURE: Ballsy is made from a PVC composite called Sil-A-Gel. The unique thing about Sil-A-Gel is that it is phthalate-free, latex-free, and non-toxic. Although the material is semi-porous, it is made with a bactericide that inhibits the growth of these little buggers. Ballsy is very squeezable and flexible, giving him a sway when he is held by the base. Yet, not enough to be floppy or hard to insert. With minimal effort, I can bend his shaft right down to his base. Now, this makes angling this fellow up to hit the g-spot near impossible. But, (and this is a big but!), it is the fact that he is so pliable that makes it possible to tolerate his advanced size. To the touch, Ballsy feels similar to jelly toys. The material is almost sticky with a lot of drag unless lubricated, in which it becomes silky-soft and slippery. Ballsy is completely smooth, with noticeably raised veins, which are located predominately over the topside of the shaft. He also boasts an engorged mushroom head and… balls, which are too oddly shaped to look realistic. I was surprised, however, that the balls carried enough sway to actually slap against my ass with each thrust.

PERFORMANCE : The base of Ballsy is flat, rather than having a suction-cup. Not only is the base easy to hold while thrusting, it would likely sit comfortably when used with a harness. However, I do not own a harness, as was unable to test this. As I mentioned above, I had no expectations before I received Ballsy. However, what I did find is that he makes a wonderfully filling thrusting partner, even though I initially doubted my ability to accommodate him. The veins are raised enough that they are felt internally and help to stimulate the g-spot and other internal pleasure spots, even without a curve. Yet, at the same time, they are silky enough that they don’t drag and create an unpleasant friction feeling. The head, which is slightly larger in diameter than the shaft, is tapered to help ease insertion. And once it is inside, allows the shaft to be easily and comfortably inserted as well. I did find that my body simply cannot take all 8 inches of Ballsy, no matter how horny or excited I am. Even with the personally excessive size, I never felt an uncomfortable feeling against my cervix while thrusting. I attribute this to his soft, pliable nature. As an alternative to plain thrusting, I find it feels amazing to tuck the balls just slightly under my bum (when lying on my back) and wiggle my pelvis up and down to create movement. Now this may seem like it would be uncomfortable, but again, because he is so long and flexible, it works.
CARE AND MAINTANCE: Sil-A-Gel is compatible with both water and silicone-based lubes. To cleanse, simply wash with mild soap and warm water or toy cleaner. Ballsy can be a total lint magnet, so be sure to store in a toy pouch, carefully protected from objects that might injure his soft material.